School Sucks

All right, I know I screwed up. Yes, I should have gone back to school like a good little girl. I know. But seriously? Expel me because I didnt go to school? What gives?

Today I went to school for the first time in 2 weeks. The teachers were not happy. It was like walking into a graveyard at midnight every single hour. It sucked. But during my 7th hour Odessyware class (where I get to do my online courses during school time) I was cornered by Mrs. Hein and Mrs. Nickelson. They told me that they were 'concerned about the situation and how your absence impacts other students in your classes' and how 'you not coming to school is not my business but when you influence the teachers it becomes my business' both quotes by Mrs. Nickelson. They told me that if I miss any more days of school I will be turminated. Then, after the 'meeting' I went to the bathroom and called my counceler and told her about it. She wants me to get all the days I've missed so far this past year and get the ones I can excused. What good will that do? They'll just come up with some other excuse to kick me out. Its like they WANT me to fail. And frankly, I'm really sick of it. I dont feel like putting up with this bullcrap anymore. But I know I have to graduate. After I came out of the bathroom Mrs. Hein wanted me to talk about 'personal issues' and how they're impacting my school. I told her as much as I could without telling her everything, basically dodging around the subjects she presented with 'I don't know's and 'we'll see's. She didnt buy it but the bell rang before she could get me into her inner office. I like having that time in her outer office during 7th hour because then I have some time to just chill for awhile while doing my online school work.

I asked Jake for help, but we ended up talking the whole time. Mostly dodging subjects that are for serious relationships and talking about whats happened for the past few weeks. Gosh was it really only the 15th that we broke up? It seems like longer. But amazingly, I dont mind. It bugs me to a point, but I'm not a heap of nothingness. I dont break down when I see his picture in my locker or binder, I dont go all sniffly when talking about him. I'm pretty proud of myself for that fact. Because that means that I really CAN live without him. And thats a good thing.

In crochet news, they blocked the 'ville at school. Which is probably a good thing since i spent too much time on there. But I mean seriously, Crochetville? Its a bunch of gals (and a few guys) that all CROCHET. Whats so bad about that? Oh yes, 'I shall stab you with my hook my pretty, and make your dog into a new scarf, ehehehehe'. Ok, little wizard of oz joke there but you get my meaning. But I guess its for the best. I need to figure out a way to get all my school stuff done first before I crochet. I've actually had grandma hide most of my hooks! I have like 2 that are still out because they have projects stuck to them, but still! Thats pretty serious.

Well, just wanted to rant for a bit. Oh, and by the way, that little Calorie Counter thing to the right is not working properly for anyone who looks at it. I have to figure out the settings and such but when I do I'll post about it. Night everyone.

Sticky Buns!

I'm making Sticky Buns! Yey! The really big kind, and why am I making sticky buns? Because I want to surprise grandma. I'm not really mad today, I'm actually in a pretty decent mood. I got a good sleep, I finished my gloves last night, even though I still have to figure out how to do the embelishments. When I'm done with proofing the pattern, I'm going to post it and my other two patterns as free on here. Hopefully that will help improve trafic to my blog, even though its not primarily crochet. I do crochet a lot though. More than I should, actually. Which is why I promised myself I will not pick up a hook until I have my homework done, and believe me I have a lot of homework to do. Its already almost noon and I still have to write up four essays. *sigh* Why do I have to disect a perfectly good book in a way that makes me want to hurl? Its already a difficult read but then when I have to get all these differnt quotes and explain them, write an essay about the chapters, and do something for a group discussion? What is up with that? Mrs. Campbell should really back off the books and focus more on the essays. Well, thats my opinion. Or at least do something different I mean I like Mrs. Campbell as a teacher but she just....I dont know. The way she teaches is the way she would teach back twelve years ago. We need more of a stimulation or at LEAST more interesting books.

Well, its 11:30 so I should get going. I'm going to be posting again later.

February Blues...or is it Reds?

Its February. Valentines month. Also, as of the 4th, 1 year since dating Jake. On the 14th, I'll be 18. But none of this matters. Why? Because love sucks.

Well, I should probably talk about everything else before I get into it with the whole Jake thing...

I was gonna blog more but that didnt happen because things just got out of hand to the point where I just, well, forgot. I have a new cat, I found her on the 23 of January. I have decided to name her Grace. She's all gray with white paws and nose and white on her belly. She's also pregnant. We aren't sure when shes going to deliver but hopefully not too soon.

The second quarter of school started and I found out that I failed Choir, American Government, and Senior Literature and Composition. I talked to Mrs. Hein, the guidance counceler, and I can make up the credit on a program called Odesyware. Right now I'm in the middle of English which i have to have done pretty soon actually. After that I'm not sure what subject I can take on Odesyware that will make up for my Choir, which is an independant. I thought that I had failed Consumer Econ too, but Mrs. Ogle is awesome and let me slide by getting my packet in. I wish I could have been that lucky with English. But, I think this semester is going to go differently. I'm THIS close to failing. I dont want to fail, not now. I'm so close, I'd dissapoint so many different people.

The courses I'm taking now are Senior Literature and Composition (its a year long class) American Government (also, a year long) Choir ( I wanted to get out of it but, oh well. Maybe I'll get to see wicked :-D) Art, Psychology, Working With Young Children, and Anatomy and Phiseology. Huh, suprisingly I spelled 'phiseology' right, it wasnt underlined :). I am hoping to post my grades up here and maybe get feedback, encouragment, and help. Currently I am passing everything, but its the beginning of the semester.

I've been sick for the past few days, stomach virus. And today I found out that you CAN NOT take your medications with Orange Juice. At least without eating. My stomach hurt like hell I thought I was going to die. But when I got home and ate, things were hunky dorey again. So, lesson learned. I had a dentist appointment today and found out that I dont brush my teeth. I coulda told you that one, but meh. So I got this nasty carmel colored crap on my teeth that I cant get rid of until tomorrow morning. Bummer :(.

I have also decided, again, that I'm going to give this whole Diet thing a shot. Well maybe not a 'diet' exactly, more like a healthier way to eat. I just got done reading a very VERY good book called The Earth, My Butt, and other BIG, Round Things. Its about a girl named Verginia that lives with the steriotypical 'perfect' family. Skinny mom, skinny dad, skinny jock brother, skinny cheerleader sister, and, well, her. Through out the novel you follow her as she descovers the 'crash diet' plan, Froggy the Fourth, and hair dye. Its an awesome book and I would reccomend it to anyone looking for an inspirational read.

Anyway, I'm planning on recording my daily food intake and posting it on the blog. Along with that I am going to calculate calories, and the make adjustments. I have a membership at the local gym so I think its aobut time I started using it. More to come, on that subject at least.

No use putting it off anymore....

Jake and I have been having some issues. Again. Well, not really. See his parents really dont like me very much at all and are continuously trying to find ways to split us up. On top of that, he's ben haing doubts. Dubts about if he's ready for such a serious relationship, mostly. So, after thinking it over (many, many many sleepless nights behind and ahead of me I'm afraid) I came up with a solution that we could both dealwith. I want him for my birthday. I want to have him as my boyfriend for Valentines day, and damn the conciquences. After that, on the 15th to be precise, we're going to 'technically' break up for the next three months. I am going to give him to the end of May to decide if he wants to either A: come back to me or B: go his own way. Either way, in the frount of my mind it is going to be treated like he's not coming back. Its just easier for my heart that way.

This time is not only for his benifit. Admitedly, I came up with this plan so that I wouldnt lose him forever. Because last time he had doubts and I took him back, I promised him (and myself) that I would NOT go though another yo-yo breakup. This was his LAST chance. This way, I'm not breaking any promises. Its a break. Just, on the outside, it'll look like a breakup. Anyway, I need this too because this way I can do all the things that I have neglected to do. Well not really neglected, just, put aside. Like bloging. So, yeah. I can get more centered on myself and not have every waking moment-and sometimes, my dreaming self- with his name on my mind. Admitedly, it probably will be for the first month at least. I have put certain rules in place that restrict our contact to a strict friendly minimum, wich will kill the both of us for awhile. But it needs to be done. ( Godess, I hate being right. )

On a lighter note, I am crocheting like a madwoman. I am currently in the process of an 'Anti Valentines' bag. Its gonna be SAWEET. I dont feel like making a million different blogs for things, so I'm going to put everything on here. So, crochetville girls, sorry, you're gonna have to weed through my rants and rambles to see the patterns and pictures. Again, Sorry ladies!

Thats about it for the moment. I should probably get back to my homework, I just felt that if I didnt write now it would be another month or two until I did get a blog post in. See ya'll later!